Focusing on the Caregiver

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you are the caregiver for someone with metastatic cancer, you may have found yourself with a new full-time job – a job for which you may feel unprepared and overwhelmed. Major decisions about your and your patient’s health, work, family, children, and future may all have to be made suddenly. In this whirlwind, caregivers sometimes forget to take care of themselves. Even the term “caregiver” implies that your function is only to give care, not to need care. But of course we all need care and respite. You as a caregiver might feel guilty voicing any complaints, telling yourself you’re not the one “really” suffering. If you are the patient, encourage your caregiver to take care of him/herself by talking about these major decisions and emotional needs. Your love and encouragement will help that person be strong enough to take care of you. These caregiver links can help you be aware of some of these major decisions (for example, whether to be the caregiver or hire help) and your need for emotional care.

Articles:

• “Caring Advice for Caregivers: How Can You Help Yourself?” CancerCare
• “Cancer: When You’re a Caregiver,” Family Doctor
• “Cancer in the Family: What It's Like for You,” National Cancer Institute

Web Sites: 

• Strength for Caring
• Cancer Caregiving